Popping Pecker (Il Piccolo Italian Stuffed Biscotti)

$19.99

Nothing brings more happenis than our Popping Pecker. Gone are the days of stale looking foreign produced potato chips in a can with plastic coated springs supposedly resembling snakes jumping out. Get the same scare and a real guffaw from our prurient-appealing springy pecker.

Except for 23% of homophobic white males, everyone loves this grinning guy, just bursting from a gourmet cookie can. No respectable paleo- or keto- fad dieter could resist these protein-packed treats bursting with protein and just 69 calories. But then, oh snap, out wiggles a waving wang.

While probably not safe for most workplaces, this is sure to be the hit of every white elephant gift exchange. And it could only get better when a recipient never opens it and regifts to Grandma. Imagine that awkward phone call.